I thought I was going to be done with "the Saga of Justin and Sloan" after my last post, but I thought of another story I'd like to share. If ya'll don't mind.
There's one other "first" that I didn't cover in my last series of blog posts: our first time saying "I love you."
If you're looking forward to a really cute, cheesy, chick-flick story, stop reading and go find another blog. Because this story is nerdy, ridiculous, and totally me (which means probably a little more awkward than cute). But if you aren't expecting that, then read on. It still makes me laugh, and I hope it makes you laugh.
Justin and I had been dating for about a month when I started to get that stupid little voice in the back of my head that would pop up at random times and say "hey, do you love him? You should say you love him. Right now. I don't care what you're doing or who's around."
Anyone else have that voice?
Just me?
Well this is awkward. Either you're crazy too, or I'm crazy on my own.
Anyway, we had come down for a weekend, I don't remember why, but before he headed back to Sandy for the night, he had come over to my house to hang out. We went down to the family room in my basement to watch a movie. Justin let me pick. I decided I was going to test him a little bit by picking one of my favorite movies from my childhood, and seeing if he could handle it (this is a deal breaker, ladies. If he can't turn off the "c(t)ool" switch long enough to watch a stupid movie with you, DROP HIM LIKE HE'S HOT). So I popped in Pokemon: Spell of the Unown. If you want to borrow it from me, I'll understand.
I was already impressed that he seemed totally happy when I turned it on, indicating a very desirable lack of tool-ness (ding ding ding we have a keeper!) However, when the short before the actual movie started and he started speaking Pokemon to me, I suddenly heard these words slip out before I could stop them: "I kind of love you."
Yes. I said I love you for the first time while watching Pokemon. Is it a little embarrassing? No! Grow up, you judgmental human! It was awesome and it was how I knew we were going to last for a long time! However, at the time I was incredibly embarrassed. It was one of those "please tell me I did not just say that" moments. Honestly, I don't even remember how he reacted because I was horrified with myself for crossing that boundary so soon after we became official. What was wrong with me?! I didn't even say it right!
I'm sure he probably laughed and acted like it was no big deal and then we watched the movie together and cuddled. I do remember later before we left that we (finally) talked about it, and I think I apologized for probably freaking him out really bad. But instead of getting awkward, he told me he kinda loved me too. And then I think we used the "m" word (aka marriage, folks) in the same conversation for the first time. After that, we used the "l" word all the time, even when we weren't watching pokemon. Haha.
They say when you know, you know. I used to laugh at those people that said that, because I had been in a serious relationship before and we had said I love you and talked about marriage and I never had that feeling. But I guess it just takes the right person (and God's blessing) for the real feeling to set in. I knew in July that I was going to marry Justin and that it was only a matter of time. I didn't tell him that of course. No point in scaring away the person you're positive you're going to spend eternity with prematurely, haha. Best save that kind of information for when you're already engaged to each other. ;)
I wouldn't go back and change a thing about our dating life. Not even the fact that I said I love you for the first time during Pokemon.
